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Divorce Counseling Essex Junction VT

Regardless of whether children grow up in one home or two, parents provide a model for conducting important relationships. Part of every important relationship is mutual respect, civilized interaction, problem solving and conflict resolution, compromise, appreciation and gratitude, patience and forgiveness. Read on for more.

Nicole Williams
(802) 857-7000
Essex Junction, VT
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, School, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Rebecca Boedges
(802) 922-2400
South Burlington, VT
Practice Areas
Career Development, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Gale Holtz Golden, LICSW, BCD, Clinical Associate Professor of Psychiatry
(802) 864-0757
86. St. Paul Street
Burlington, VT
Specialties
Depression,Divorce,Infertility or Adoption,Loss or Grief,Relationship Issues,Sex Therapy
Education
Clinical social work degree from Bryn Mawr College graduate school of social work (1963). Postgraduate work in psychology and psychiatry at Syracuse University and Upstate Medical Center 1977-1979. Yearly continuingeducation and peer collaboration
Insurance
Yes

Associates in Couples Counseling
(802) 518-0962
Associates in Couples Counseling431 Pine Street
Burlington, VT
Specialties
Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues
Qualification
School: Antioch New England Graduate School
Year of Graduation: 1985
Years In Practice: 15+ Years
Patient Info
Ethnicity: Any
Gender: All
Age: Adults
Payment Methods
Sliding Scale: No

Azimuth Counseling & Therapeutic Services
(802) 288-1001
8 Essex Way
Essex Junction, VT
 
Elizabeth Lemaire-Jenkins
(802) 655-0585
Winooski, VT
Practice Areas
Clinical Mental Health, Eating Disorders, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Cherie J Troyen
(802) 651-7505
Colchester, VT
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified School Counselor, National Certified Counselor

Kristen McEvoy
(802) 656-3340
Burlington, VT
Practice Areas
Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Supervision
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Jessica Donnelly
(802) 518-4623 x397
112 Lake Street
Burlington, VT
Specialties
Depression, Anxiety or Fears, Divorce, Mood Disorders
Patient Info
Ethnicity: Any
Gender: All
Age: Children (6 to 10),Preteens / Tweens (11 to 13),Adolescents / Teenagers (14 to 19),Adults
Payment Methods
Sliding Scale: Yes
Accepted Insurance Plans: Aetna

Christian Counseling & Mediation
(802) 879-1103
17 Lincoln St
Essex Junction, VT
 

11 Quick Questions about Divorce

11 Quick Questions About Divorce


1. How does the quality of one's relationship with their ex-spouse influence the psychological adjustment of their children?

Regardless of whether children grow up in one home or two, parents provide a model for conducting important relationships. Part of every important relationship is mutual respect, civilized interaction, problem solving and conflict resolution, compromise, appreciation and gratitude, patience and forgiveness. When parents model angry, selfish and bitter interaction with one another, their children learn that these disrespectful behaviors are the protocol for how people should be treated. It is no wonder that children from high conflict divorce have a higher incidence of failed relationships later in life. I believe this is why.

2. You write, "Smart parenting is all about trading the momentary relief of venting anger and frustration at your co-parent for the benefit of raising healthier, more productive, and less stressed children." How can a parent deal with their anger in a healthy way that does not cause more pain to their children?
Break a clay pot, scream into a pillow, make a voodoo doll out of modeling clay. Do what ever you want (as long as it is legal and outside of your children's presence) but do not expose your children to toxic emotion. Oh yes, and read my book.

3. How can a person de-escalate the conflict between themselves and their ex-spouse?

It takes two people to fight. The key to de-scalation is ignoring insult and offering reasonable compromises. This takes practice because often, in poor co-parenting relationships people cannot resist the urge to fight fire with fire. Actually to continue the imagery, it is best to fight fire with water. Parents often ask, "Why shoud I give the co-parent what he/she wants?" The answer to this is "because when you can, and when it doesn't much matter one way or the other (i.e. an extra few minutes here and there) the reduction in conflict benefits the kids."

4. What is the "package" that can make a difference in the quality of communication between the ex-spouses?

Resist the urge to "dig" or "poke" with sarcasm and direct insults. Understand that if you hate the co-parent, it is more difficult to love the part of your child that came from the co-parent. Take relief in the fact that any communication you have with the co-parent has a beginning and an end (at least for the moment) and when the contact is over you don't have to go back home and sleep with them.

5. Can you share with us some practical tips for negotiating with a former spouse who is a jerk?
Again, realize that giving in on minor issues is not a sign of personal weakness; on the contrary it is s sign of strength. Understand that what makes people as difficult as they are is that they "enjoy the fight." Fighting, bickering and nitpicking is feeding a part of them that they enjoy -- and that most likely y...

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