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Divorce Counseling Havelock NC

Regardless of whether children grow up in one home or two, parents provide a model for conducting important relationships. Part of every important relationship is mutual respect, civilized interaction, problem solving and conflict resolution, compromise, appreciation and gratitude, patience and forgiveness. Read on for more.

David Ellis
(252) 447-7764
Havelock, NC
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Callie Byron
(910) 451-7302
Atlantic Beach, NC
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Susan Lansche
(252) 259-2999
New Bern, NC
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Barbara Dunn
(252) 634-2855
New Bern, NC
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Ms. Kate Gotelli
Carolina Behavioral Care
(919) 245-5400
209 Millstone Drive Suite A
Hillsborough, NC
Credentials
Credentials: MSW, LCSW
Licensed in North Carolina
14 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Bipolar Disorders, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder, Sexual Abuse/Rape, Stress, Trauma/PTSD, Life Transitions, Women's Issues, Postpart
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided By:
Robert Webster
(252) 466-3264
Cherry Point, NC
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Sports Counseling, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Dianne Brown
(252) 726-4008
Morehead City, NC
Practice Areas
Career Development, Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Margaret Minsk
(252) 288-2724
New Bern, NC
Practice Areas
Eating Disorders, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Disaster Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Ms. Roxanne Barksdale
Hillsborough Institute for Change
(919) 732-8722
Ste. 102 960 Corporate Drive
Hillsborough, NC
Credentials
Credentials: MSW, LCSW, CTA
Licensed in North Carolina
30 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Aging, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Bipolar Disorders, Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Domestic Violence, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Infertility, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Physical Illness/Impairment, Pr
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Step Families, Gifted
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Preschool (Under 6), Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided By:
Ms. Christina Howes
A Work in Progress Therapies, Inc.
(910) 323-3289
915 Bingham Drive
Fayetteville, NC
Credentials
Credentials: MSW, LCSW
Licensed in North Carolina
17 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Bipolar Disorders, Career/Employment Concerns, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Dissociative Disorders, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Spiritual/Religious Co
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans, Caregivers, Gifted, Biracial, Grandparents
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59), Seniors (60 +)

Data Provided By:
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11 Quick Questions about Divorce

11 Quick Questions About Divorce


1. How does the quality of one's relationship with their ex-spouse influence the psychological adjustment of their children?

Regardless of whether children grow up in one home or two, parents provide a model for conducting important relationships. Part of every important relationship is mutual respect, civilized interaction, problem solving and conflict resolution, compromise, appreciation and gratitude, patience and forgiveness. When parents model angry, selfish and bitter interaction with one another, their children learn that these disrespectful behaviors are the protocol for how people should be treated. It is no wonder that children from high conflict divorce have a higher incidence of failed relationships later in life. I believe this is why.

2. You write, "Smart parenting is all about trading the momentary relief of venting anger and frustration at your co-parent for the benefit of raising healthier, more productive, and less stressed children." How can a parent deal with their anger in a healthy way that does not cause more pain to their children?
Break a clay pot, scream into a pillow, make a voodoo doll out of modeling clay. Do what ever you want (as long as it is legal and outside of your children's presence) but do not expose your children to toxic emotion. Oh yes, and read my book.

3. How can a person de-escalate the conflict between themselves and their ex-spouse?

It takes two people to fight. The key to de-scalation is ignoring insult and offering reasonable compromises. This takes practice because often, in poor co-parenting relationships people cannot resist the urge to fight fire with fire. Actually to continue the imagery, it is best to fight fire with water. Parents often ask, "Why shoud I give the co-parent what he/she wants?" The answer to this is "because when you can, and when it doesn't much matter one way or the other (i.e. an extra few minutes here and there) the reduction in conflict benefits the kids."

4. What is the "package" that can make a difference in the quality of communication between the ex-spouses?

Resist the urge to "dig" or "poke" with sarcasm and direct insults. Understand that if you hate the co-parent, it is more difficult to love the part of your child that came from the co-parent. Take relief in the fact that any communication you have with the co-parent has a beginning and an end (at least for the moment) and when the contact is over you don't have to go back home and sleep with them.

5. Can you share with us some practical tips for negotiating with a former spouse who is a jerk?
Again, realize that giving in on minor issues is not a sign of personal weakness; on the contrary it is s sign of strength. Understand that what makes people as difficult as they are is that they "enjoy the fight." Fighting, bickering and nitpicking is feeding a part of them that they enjoy -- and that most likely y...

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